What I’ve Learned From My Kid This Month

(aka: My 9-Year-Old is Now My Life Coach, CEO, Therapist, and Nutritionist)

Every month, I think I’ve seen it all. I strut into parenthood like, “Okay, I’ve got this,” and then—BAM. My daughter hits me with another gem of wisdom, another roast I didn’t see coming, or an unlicensed TED Talk at 6:45am over toast. 🥲 Like, girl, can I just drink my coffee in peace without being emotionally rearranged?

Lately, it’s like she leveled up. She’s out here giving unsolicited advice like a motivational speaker who moonlights as a therapist with zero chill. She's questioning my screen time, side-eyeing my snack choices (“Mom, are Takis a food group now?”), and calling me out for saying "I'm fine" when I'm clearly not.

Basically, she’s nine going on CEO of my life.

This month in particular? She’s been on fire. 🔥 Not just throwing out zingers, but actually dropping perspective-shifting truth bombs like she’s the main character in my self-growth journey. Honestly, I’m starting to wonder if I’m the assistant in this parent-child duo.

So, in the spirit of giving credit where it's due, here’s what this pocket-sized powerhouse has taught me lately. Spoiler: she’s not wrong. And yes, I’m both humbled and slightly scared.

1. “Taylor” is the future.

Apparently, when she has a baby someday (again—no pressure, kid), she’s naming it Taylor. Why? “Because it can be for a boy or a girl. Or neither. Or both. It’s perfect.”...I swear she said it with the same tone Marie Kondo uses when something sparks joy. 🧺✨

Meanwhile, I was naming my imaginary kids “Princess Unicornia” and “Luna Sparkle” in grade 4. She’s out here creating a gender-inclusive legacy. I’m just trying to keep up without crying into my tea.

2. “Slay” is over. RIP me.

Me (proudly, thinking I’m so hip): “You SLAY, babe!!!”

Her (full body cringe): “Ughhh… no one says that anymore, Mom. That’s like… old.”

OLD??? I just mastered “slay”! I used it in a text last week and thought I was Beyoncé for 6.5 seconds. Now apparently it’s dead. Buried. Canceled. 💀

I’m not even mad. I’m just emotionally injured and possibly banned from using Gen Alpha slang forever.

3. Weekend work + investing = ???

The other night she casually says: “As soon as I’m allowed to work, I’m getting a weekend job at the bakery. I want to start making money and investing.”

INVESTING, Y’ALL. 📈

She said it with the same chill as if she were talking about watching cartoons. I had to sit down. At her age, I was spending my allowance on fuzzy pens and Lisa Frank notebooks. She's trying to build her portfolio before puberty.

Also, let’s be real: she’ll probably retire at 37 while I’m still making packed lunches and wondering where all my socks go.

4. She wants to donate to an animal shelter. 🐾

Randomly, in the middle of doing cartwheels in the living room, she goes:

“Can we donate to an animal shelter? The dogs probably need warm blankets.”

WHO IS THIS CHILD?? Is she secretly running a nonprofit out of her bedroom? Why is her heart so big??Meanwhile I’m like: “Can we donate this random Tupperware lid with no container to the trash?” 😬

5. She’s literally the reason I try.

She’s so affectionate. She hugs me out of the blue. She compliments my cooking (even when it’s just rice and beans on repeat), and she tells me, “I want you to be healthy, Mom.” 🥹

She’s why I eat my veggies.

She’s why I go to yoga when I’d rather watch Netflix in bed.

She’s why I’ve learned to say “no” to things that drain me.

Because she looks at me like I’m Wonder Woman in leggings… and I kind of want to live up to that.

6. She baked banana bread alone. And made pancakes. 🧁🥞

Last weekend, I heard kitchen clattering and feared the worst. But nope—she was baking banana bread. SOLO. No supervision. Just vibes and a recipe she’s basically memorized.

It turned out amazing. Moist. Perfect. Better than mine, if I’m being honest. (Which I am. Grudgingly.)

THEN—Sunday morning—she made PANCAKES. From scratch. All by herself. I walked in like, “Should I call Gordon Ramsay or child labor services?” She just flipped another pancake and said, “I’m practicing for when I open my café.”

SOMEONE CALL SHARK TANK.

7. That confidence, though. 🔥

She walks into new situations like she owns the room. She’s friendly, funny, self-assured…

She’s the kid other kids gravitate to, and adults go, “Wow, she’s so mature.”

I look at her and think, “I wish I was like that at 9.”

Heck, I wish I was like that now at my grown-up age (which I will not disclose, thank you very much). 😎

But she’s not bossy. She’s bold and kind. And she knows who she is.

I’m convinced she was sent here not just to be my daughter—but my guide, hype girl, and occasional personal trainer.

So yeah... she's raising me 💁‍♀️

Let’s be real: I thought parenting was going to be a one-way street. I’d teach her life lessons, she’d grow up strong, and I’d pat myself on the back. 😂Turns out she’s the one dropping truth bombs over dinner and redefining everything I thought I knew.

She’s showing me what emotional intelligence actually looks like.

She’s reminding me how fun it is to play, to bake, to plan wild dreams, and to actually believe in them.

She’s the best kind of mirror—one that makes me want to be the version of myself that she already thinks I am. 💗

So tell me this—what’s something your kid (or a kid in your life) has taught you recently?

Was it a brutally honest truth bomb that stopped you in your tracks? A hilarious one-liner that made you spit out your coffee? Or maybe a surprisingly deep moment that made you pause mid-toast-spreading and go, “Wow… okay, philosopher child.”

Kids have this wild superpower of being unfiltered, observant, and weirdly wise at the most unexpected times. Whether they make us laugh, cry, or re-evaluate our entire approach to life while they’re still in their pajamas—these tiny humans somehow keep us grounded and growing.

👇👇👇 Drop your story in the comments—funny, heartwarming, savage, or sweet—and let’s raise a toast (or a pancake, or whatever’s not currently covered in syrup) to the little legends who are clearly running the show. 🥂🥞💬💖

-Fabi